I move every year. Don’t ask me why, it’s just a thing I do. A thing I’m use to. The one obvious proof I clearly have commitment issues. I have moved every year since 2011; that’s almost 10 years of moving and I’ve never renewed a lease. There’s too many other places and areas to discover! I don’t do well with staying in one place for too long.
You’d think with knowing this I’d be PRO at packing and unpacking right? Hell no. Not even close. I feel like every year I have even MORE stuff than the last time I had to pack/move. I guess now that I have a toddler that doesn’t really make anything better either. And even worse is we haven’t even started packing yet. I don’t know what is going on but I’m definitely disappointed in myself.
Resurfaced situations suck. There’s no way around that. And despite how respectful or kind you are to someone; they can still belittle, disrespect and drag your name across the mud and the reality is there’s nothing you can do about it. I always say “people will be people,” as in, they’ll always be who they ARE regardless of their situations, environment’s or the kindness they get from others.
But knowing this doesn’t help that I get anxiety over certain things. That I sit up wondering why someone doesn’t like me if I’ve never done anything to them. And this is something that’s haunted me pretty much my whole life. People won’t like me because of a third party source. I grew up in a place where people wouldn’t like you because they wanted your man. They didn’t like you BECAUSE you were “too nice”. So growing up with that constant reminder made me super guarded.
But when people who trust do it to you; it’s a whole different kind of hurt and anger. Despite knowing these people are just who they are and best thing you can do is put distance between you and them. Some people will never be honest, will never own up to why they did something to hurt you. And that SHOULD be none of your business in the sense that holding on to something expecting an answer only hurts you. And not at all them.
There are a lot of things in life we can’t control. But the things we can control; like how we react to situations. The fights we show up for. Not letting bitter people make you bitter as well. Finding your own peace. Are things we should spend more time and energy on. I know it’s easier said than done, I literally have to actively choose the road of positivity. While you seem to just auto cruise on the road of negativity. But it’s another thing that’s mainly a journey and not a destination.
So this week I will focus on the things I CAN control and not give so much time to the things I CAN’T control.
What do you hope to manifest for yourself this week?