Show of hands of how many people are glad this dang year is almost over.
I have a few basic goals for this month… that mostly have to do with money, budgeting and flipping my shit because this is the time of year where I just want to go shopping, constantly. Though I’m wondering if the fact I choose to still stay away from malls will help ease that. Nah, probably not. Not when there’s stuff like Afterpay around online.
It’s almost the end of the month so there’s also prepping for holidays and yearly recaps. And hoping 2021 will be a shit ton better!
I had planned to do Blogtober this year but I didn’t factor in that we were moving this week and how much mental space that would take, especially considering that our day of move was LESS than smooth. It was actually horrible. We came in a week earlier to figure out space and where to put things and noticed that the construction workers were using our fridge to store their lunches and apparently alcohol. When I went to return the key I told them about it and they said they’d have it all cleaned and sanitized.
On move in day nothing was cleaned or sanitized. I went and disinfected the whole inside of the fridge, the shower and the bathroom floors in the master bedroom. I haven’t cleaned anything in the guest room/bathroom yet since we’re still working on moving things in and there would be no reason to when it would just drive me crazy that everything is getting “dirty” again. We were also missing our microwave rotating plate and our hot water was off. Which we didn’t even notice until we went to take a shower at 330am. So yeah, we took miserable cold showers.
We’ve now moved everything from our old apt to our new one and omg, I had like 3 boxes of candles. Idk how I got to this point, honestly but I’m absolutely over it at this point. I have a hard time letting go of things but this is insane. I shouldn’t have 3 full boxes of candles. And that doesn’t even include the insane amount of wax melts I also found.
Moving really makes you realize just how much shit you have and how much you’ve held on to.
I know I missed 2 other blog posts last week and I’m hoping I’ll have time to make up for it this week; that’s just life. I got caught up in rebuilding hazearella which I’m proud of the results at the end of the week!
I stumbled on a blog post from writing from nowhere where she created a series of inspiring quotes in wallpaper format.
This one is currently my lock screen wallpaper. I use to change mine out every week with a new quote; it definitely helped me keep myself accountable and focused on my goals. I should start that up again!
This morning I thought of something I wanted to manifest and wanted to share it on my blog; maybe every week I’ll make it a point to think of what I want to manifest for that week or even just that day.
I admit that I absolutely tend to care what people say or think about me. Sometimes a little too much. There was a time I legitimately didn’t care cause I was either so self confident in myself or too full of myself to even believe them; I often miss those days and wonder where they went — but tbh they were the last days before anxiety crept into my life and changed everything.
It’s been over 10 years since then and my name has been dragged through the mud so much since. Between ex boyfriends and ex husbands who tell reverse tales of what really happened, to ex and current in laws who shame me for speaking about mental health and sharing my stories (which to them makes me “full of shit” and a bad mom).
I know you can’t please everyone and the ones who know you best will always know who you truly are despite what anyone says about you; but it does bother me. And it does take a lot of my thought process and healing space.
So this week, I’m manifesting the quote above; people will always have something to say about you, but what they say and what they think is none of your business in the first place.
Bubba got the flu last Saturday and he passed it to Tums who then passed it to me. Bubba seemed to get over it the quickest at like 2 days. Tums took about maybe 3 days and I’m still sick a week later. I’m starting to feel a little more like myself every day; minus the dizziness and not being very hungry.
But at least the fevers for me only lasted about 2 days. Every time I ate I felt like throwing up and the dizziness came around day 4 and still hasn’t left. It’s not like super extreme or anything but enough to be annoying. I’ve been trying to get as much rest and sleep as I can (something that’s hard to do with a baby who can’t self soothe yet) and forcing myself to eat. I’m awful when it comes to liquids mainly because I HATE water but I’ve been trying to drink juice and eat more soup, at least.
Getting the flu always feels like you don’t remember what feeling well feels like lmao, it’s so weird. And it definitely puts you in the I’ll-be-better-with-my-health plea to the universe.
So, here’s how I plan to be better at being healthy;
I know, this post is super late today but I just didn’t have time to post it any earlier sadly.
And even now, the baby is sick with a cold (I hope it’s a cold) so she’s really clingy and feeling miserable.
I know blogging as been pushed to the side and even though I’m trying super hard to get back into my social media, it’s been a challenge. Throw in drama over a post and it pretty much destroyed any happiness I had linked to writing, especially on Facebook.