I’ve always had a love/hate relationship with Christmas ever since I was little — to the point where in my teen and early adulthood years it caused seasonal depression. My worst mental breakdown came around the holidays in 2014 which completely wrecked me mentally and I still to this day get hallucinations when I’m overly stressed; even if I feel fine.
So me and the holidays have never really had a very good or healthy relationship.
In the more recent years I’ve tried to focus on self traditions to find ways to enjoy the holidays because depressed or not the holidays are really a beautiful time of the year.