I typically celebrate Easter as my “self holiday” since I love stocking up on Easter snacks. But I feel like there really werent that much this year to choose from! I def had a struggle putting a basket together for Tums.
I also put together a basket for B.
B had given us our Easter baskets early; mine is on the left and Tums is on the right. The Cotton Candy in mine is “Blueberry Waffle” and omg it’s amazing. It legit tastes like waffles!
Luckily Tums is too little to understand and all she knows is she just got more candy just for her. We didn’t get big baskets this year because if you can see the sort of hint in the back — we have a big trip coming up! And I’m super duper excited. Still struggling with depression over here but trust me, inside I’m screaming from excitement. I just… need to pack. Which I’m always bad with.
Earlier in March we took a trip to Dallas cause I wanted to check out the Easter collection at LUSH and we were planning on heading to the Dallas Farmers Market but ended up going to another mall instead. Whomp. Some day I’ll make it to that Farmers Market!
Tbh I wish I could spend more time in Dallas, there’s so much to see and do and discover there!
We did head to my favorite mall and I saw that Sugarfina had successfully finished moving into their bigger store. So I made a small haul purchase.
But we’re not here to talk about that, we’re here to talk about the Bunny Bark!
Last year I told Bubba that Easter was one of my favorite hoildays; my mom always made sure we had Easter baskets and as I got older she started adding Tulips to my Easter basket gifts. But when I moved away to work for Disney, she wasn’t there to set up an Easter basket for me (though some years she would ship me one) and so I started making Easter baskets for myself.
(Fun Fact: Despite I was married before for pretty much 11 years, my ex husband never ONCE made me an Easter basket. Then again it took divorce papers to actually buy me a birthday gift for the first time ever so who knows.)
Last year Bubba made me an Easter basket claiming I can’t make them for myself so he put together a basket and brought it with him to Disney World since we were spending my birthday there and he was flying out on Easter.
To this day, I have no idea how he fit that giant basket into his duffel bag.
I am a person of tradition; I can’t help it. It’s how I cope with my anxiety and how I push through the times I’m feeling suicidal/that life isn’t worth living. It gives me something to look forward to.
Traditions have always been a big part of my mom’s life too, and she always made sure we did these traditions every year.
In that sort of sense, I have Spring Must Haves meaning every Spring I grab for these items. Some of I buy every time around this year (I have one of these for Fall as well) and others are discontinued but I still enjoy them every Spring.
These Egg Truffles from See’s Candies is one of those things I grab every single year. This started in 2015 so it’s a fairly new tradition. I’m a sucker for anything white chocolate and lemon. So put the two together into a truffle and of course I’m going to fall in love! I’m also a fan of anything dark chocolate and raspberry but I don’t remember that truffle all too much sadly, I just know I always finish the lemon ones in this set first. Every single year.
Sour Bunnies from Williams Sonoma is my Spring/Easter JAMMMM. I honestly don’t remember when this tradition started — 2008? 2010? This one has been around for a long while! I remember taste testing these in stores and I wanted a whole bag but my ex husband at the time was against me buying anything that would make me happy basically and shoved me out of the store before I could. So I bought myself a bag online and hid it (something I did often though it helped we didn’t live together for another few months). And I remember the next year buying myself 2 bags.
These come in 3 flavors; the pink is grapefruit, the green is key lime and the yellow is lemon. Tbh I’m only here for the key lime so imagine my excitement when I walked into WS to buy these a few weeks ago and I found a damn near ALL GREEN BAG. I might had squealed. My boyfriend didn’t understand what I was so hyped about so I explained it. He’s not a fan of sour candy so this bag is pretty much all for me because a word of caution: THESE BABIES ARE SOUUUUUUUR! I am a sucker for sour candies and especially sour gummies.
Something I grab also every year is Cadbury Mini Eggs.
This tradition started in 2002 when my best friend Sammie at the time had grabbed a bag from Target before we decided to sit in front of my boyfriend at the time’s house. He was on house arrest (don’t ask) and so since he couldn’t come hang out with us, we decided to go hang out with him (he literally lived like maybe 5 blocks from my parent’s house) however his parents also said no visitors and he couldn’t step outside the house.
So we snacked on these while we sat on his sidewalk and chatted it up with him as he stuck his head out the window lmao. My childhood was definitely interesting.
But since then these have been a repeat buy, they’re SO GOOD. And they’re the perfect comfort chocolate when your period has you feeling all kinds of weird and sad ways.
One of the traditions my mom had was Easter baskets.
I’m not sure when my brother exactly stopped wanting Easter baskets but I know that even now at almost 33 it’s still something I often look forward to.
When I was married my ex never made me an Easter basket, ever. I always made them for the both of us and I didn’t mind, it was my tradition anyway.
So every year I would make myself an Easter basket. And in it I would include a few things; one being a hollow bunny with icing eyes. Like Baby Binks usually. I didn’t opt for him because Target didn’t carry him this year, instead I thought of trying something new — a hollow squirrel. Typically as long as it’s a hollow piece of chocolate, it works. Though over the year it’s always been a Baby Binks.
This kind of blurs in with Valentine’s Day as well but these are my two favorite nail polish shades for Spring; Eternal Optimist by Essie and Starfish by Sinful Colors.
I haven’t painted my nails pink this year just yet and my Easter dress is mint green so… yeah. I meannn I might just paint them pink anyway.
Sugared Peony Petals from Bath & Body Works is hands down one of my favorite floral candle scents — ever! Well besides anything Lavender. I’m so sad that this was only around for Spring of 2016. This is actually my only back up left. I have a mini version but the throw isn’t as epic as the 3 wick one. And this candle started my love for Peony!
I have yet to find a dupe that smells as good as this one!
I normally just have this one laying around as decor. Which is fine cause even removing the lid gives off a nice throw either way.
But really Bath & Body Works, PLEASE BRING THIS BACK!
Pulled Taffy and Rock Candy wax melts from Walmart are also my favorite scents to melt in the Spring time. They’re really fruity light scents that remind you of sunny days! There was also a Pink Velvet one that came out around this time (these have been a part of my life since 2016 as well) but I have no idea where that melt of mine has gone off to!
I also buy Krispy Kreme donuts every Easter season but we haven’t gone to grab those yet so no photo. Maybe when we do I’ll insert a photo here and edit the post since I think that’s happening Saturday!
I literally don’t know why I’m getting anxiety just thinking about writing this blog post. I feel like my blood has run cold and all my nerves are on alert.
I guess just thinking of this day still makes me cringe.
Traditions are very important to me. And I created traditions for myself to enjoy the things I like in life, to have things to look forward to. Because when your life is lonely and your mind can be your greatest enemy the best way to combat that is to have something to look forward to. To have bits of this life that excite you.
Two years ago I lived in Lake Mary, Florida. I moved away from Orlando and it was the biggest and dumbest move I ever made. I was told by the guy I was dating at the time that I wouldn’t be that far from Orlando or Disney and we would be able to go any time.
That was a lie.
I had to fight with him for a week to get to Disney and even when we finally DID go, he would be miserable the whole time and want to leave as soon as we got there. We were an hour away, maybe less. But hell he’d get upset if I said I wanted to go to Krispy Kreme which was ten minutes away. He was the type to expect you to go/do everything HE wanted to do without question yet when I wanted to do the things I’ve ALWAYS done he’d throw a fit and trap me in the house. This was a big thing of his btw, trapping me. I didn’t really notice it until I moved to Lake Mary.
Two year ago today was Easter.
I normally spent Easter at Disney and I had brought up this months before to which he said was fine, we could spend Easter there since he had no real plans. But the day before was saying all of a sudden we couldn’t go and I HAD to go with him to his grandparents house. His grandparents house were we spent EVERY OTHER FUCKIN DAY doing NOTHING but staring at the wall, literally. Not to mention my cousin who I hadn’t seen in year since I moved away from California was going to be in Tampa and he had ZERO interest in seeing her or meeting her — in fact he had zero interest in meeting ANY of my family members including my parents.
The morning of, he did what he always did.
He firmly stated we WEREN’T going to Disney. Demanded I get dressed and get ready to go with him to his grandparent’s house.
I was tired of him gas lighting me. I was tired of him promising to do something then last minute going back on his word then picking a fight with me to shut me up when I’d call him out on it. I was tired of his shit.
So I said no. I wasn’t going. I wasn’t leaving the house if we weren’t going to Disney. That I’m sick of him lying to me.
He walked over to the computer desk where I was sitting.
He picked me up by my throat.
Then he SLAMMED me on the couch wrapping his hands around my throat and screaming at me asking if “I was done acting like a child.” I tried kicking him in his gut, in his face, anywhere to get him off of me. I was screaming for him to get off of me. To let me go. He kept screaming “No. Not until you stop acting like a child.” That was his reason for everything when shit like this happened I was the one acting like a child.
He finally let go.
Then he did what he always did afterwards, he sat CALMLY like a fuckin psycho telling me that if I kept acting like this we wouldn’t last for much longer. To which I replied, “put your hands on me again and I promise we won’t.” he laughed. He fuckin laughed. Then patted my shoulder and told me to have a nice day before leaving the house.
I wanted to burn the apartment to the ground.
I stayed in my room with the door locked hiding in my closet and cried for hours. I stayed quiet. I listened for when he’d come back. I made sure I was in bed and ‘asleep’ by the time he came back. I hated being scared. I hated myself. I hated Easter. He ruined my favorite holiday without so much as a fuckin care. I was heartbroken.
Then he had the nerve to come home and hug me like he didn’t just put his hands on me. Claiming he didn’t slam me that hard and to quit acting like a baby. As if slamming your girlfriend anywhere for any reason was fuckin normal. Then went on to claim that I needed his money when he blew all his money on comic book and Hot Wheels.
He didn’t pay rent. He didn’t pay bills. He didn’t pay electric or internet. He didn’t even pay for his own gas or food. He literally didn’t pay for shit. I laughed when he said I needed his money. I never needed his money or him. But in his delusional mind he really thought he was doing some shit for the ‘household’ when he didn’t do shit. He didn’t even pay for the Netflix or Hulu he was fuckin using. And when I would remind him of rent he would again fight with me and the cycle started all over again.
This day however was the first time he picked me up and slammed me. Through out our relationship he would do it again. And again.
And no matter how hard I tired to kick him out. Or break up with him he just wouldn’t get the fuckin hint. He would ignore me. If I could had afforded to change the locks on the apartment and leave all his shit outside I would had. But I had nowhere to go, nowhere to hide and no one to turn to. I was stranded in a city an hour away from anyone I knew. And it was definitely scary.
I refused to let this day take away my love for Easter. But every time it comes up, it just hurts to think someone out there thought this was okay.
I’m thankful I’m out of that relationship. I’m thankful I’m away from all that toxic energy and I’m somewhere far away from there and safe. And around someone who goes above and beyond these days to make sure every holiday is one I’ll love.