February always reminds me of when I really started to write in this blog. I had originally called it Places & Peonies and it was suppose to be a safe place for me to blog. I needed somewhere I could be transparent and unfiltered. I had just suffered a miscarriage and everyone around me (minus my BFF Xyl) was telling me that “it’s not something to blog/post about” but blogging has always been my therapy. Since 1999. So to tell me I can’t talk about this life event that hurt me so deeply?
I created this as a secret blog. With the hopes it would help me heal. With the hopes I could fill it with pretty pictures, adventures and be a place I can look back on and remind myself of how hard the journey was, but how I survived it. That was 5 years ago. It’s crazy to see how this blog has shifted and changed since then. I still don’t know wtf my niche for it is. And sometimes I stop myself from posting because I think “is that blog post even helpful?”
And while I do love writing the *insert number here* ways to stay calm or whatever; I also love writing my brain dumps. Because sometimes I just need to write some shit out. And we relate through experiences others share. It helps us feel less alone. So I hate the times when I stop myself from writing how I feel just because I don’t think it’s what blogging is about anymore. I’m trying to be better at it.
Here are a few things I want to accomplish this month;
| Build my food blog
I know I’ve been saying this one forever and I honestly don’t know WHAT is taking me so long to get this one done. I think it’s just one of those things where I don’t think my content is “good enough” or something. I really wish I could stop doing that — maybe it should be a goal of mine to work on that too!
| Go to Disneyland with my BFFs
This one is most likely happening and I. Am. So. Excited! I haven’t been to Disneyland in like 11 years. So much as changed since the last time I was there and ahhhh. I’m just so excited!
| Take a foodie trip through Sonoma Valley
My BFF took me on a Yountville foodie week, pretty much. And it was amazing. I still need to blog about that. Sonoma Valley was also one of my favorite places to go on adventures. I haven’t been back there in such a long time. I’m curious to see how much it’s changed. I did check to see if my fav restaurant was still open… and thankfully they are!
| M E L T I N G. P O T
One place I really really miss eating at! Really going to try to work this one into my trip to Cali later this month! I’ve been to several but my favorite one might be in Marin; it’s like inside of a wine cellar. It’s so freakin pretty. And the vibe at night is just everything.
| Try my best to get back into a blogging routine
I know I tend to only post MMM posts and it bothers me to see that that’s all I tend to post. So I’m trying to get back into posting 3-4 times a week just because… there’s a lot more stuff I want to talk about… but for some reason I just don’t. Plus being on a routine makes me feel so much more productive.
| Post content when it’s taken
Another one I know I say A LOT. I take so many pictures and plan so much content, yet, when it comes to blogging or posting about it… I tend to just not. Then time passes and the content is out of season. And I do this all the time. So let’s change that in 2022 self, ok? Ok.
| Release a Valentine’s Day / Spring themed set
I failed on the Valentine’s Day one already. Anything I’d come up with at this point would have to be made in house and I’m realizing that in the move some of my business stuff got misplaced. So. That’s low key frustrating. I’m hoping to be better at planning theme’s early so I can have a better idea of stock.
| Take self care a little more seriously
Now that I can take baths again, I’m really excited about it. I’ve missed being able to take baths! I’m hoping to spend more time doing my previous self care routines!
| Do. What. Makes. You. Happy
P E R I O D. This is the year of selfishness for me. I spent too many years being passive aggressive. Trying to keep the peace. Not voicing how I felt just to avoid an argument. Even if lots of other things started arguments. I’m just tired of it. I’m tired of not being myself cause it doesn’t fit someone else’s mold. At the end of the day, this is my life and my happiness and my dreams and wants and needs matter. And I’m done letting someone else convince me I’m wrong or hard to love.
We all know February is the shortest month of the year. So I’m not trying to put too much pressure on myself to even make a far fetched goals list. There are a few things I want to focus on more than others. And I’m hoping I’ll keep that stuff a priority. I’m also so over Winter at this point and I’m ready for pastel colors and Spring!
4 thoughts on “Hello February”
First of all, I am deeply sorry for your miscarriage. If it helps you heal, I think you should blog about it.
As for your February goals, a lot of them are impressive! We share some of the same goals. Like you, I want to get back into the routine of regularly blogging and posting content.
Best of luck in achieving your goals for this month!
Valerie | https://avecvalerie.com
Thank you so much! It happened about 4-ish years ago. I think I pushed most of it away and just make dark jokes about it now. Maybe some day I’ll do some shadow work about it!
The getting back into the blogging routine is proving to be the hardest one so far lol! I hope your Feb is going great!
Sometimes, making dark jokes about past experiences help us get through them. I’m glad you found a way to cope that works for you.
So far, my February is good! It’s going by so quickly. Hope you’re doing well!
Only you know what works for you. Never doubt your inner wisdom for healing 💚